You are the product of all who came before you, a legacy of your family, all of the good and the bad, it is all a part of who you are. Stop hiding. It only prolongs the pain. ~ Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings
On this notable day I wish a Happy 55th Wedding Anniversary to my father and mother. You are the inheritors and progenerators of a great legacy of faith in Christ and of people of quality character, diversity, and service. Undoubtedly one of the pastimes that I miss the most during my incarceration is continuing my genealogical and ancestral research. In my early twentys I enjoyed going to the OK Historic Society's Archives in the Capitol and to the LDS libraries to discover surprises on microfiche and old books. Later on I loved spending my downtime on Ancestry.com scrolling through family trees and reading old documents. I would get so excited every time a "new leaf notice" popped up in my email! I am proud to descend from people of European, native indigenous American (Choctaw and Cherokee), and west African blood. I am thrilled to be descended from an historic legacy that includes generations of English monarchs and courageous naval officers, forefathers who signed the Mayflower compact, brave grandfathers who signed the Declaration of Independence and defended our Nation's freedom, the fathers of George Washington as well as Sequoyah, those ancestors who battled for a united country and the abolishment of slavery, and the extraordinary men who served in WWI, WWII, and then Korean and Vietnam conflicts. I even hold dear the stories of those more nefarious characters who were tyrant kings, bootleggers, and outlaws while reluctantly embracing those whom, unfortunately, stood on the wrong side of the U.S. civil war. And I am proud to descend from Robert and Patricia! The Lord has given me the heritage of those who reverenced his name (1). Coincidentally, I have been considering my personal legacy since my 2021 Christmas posting and holiday prayer for my own beloved prodigal Absalom/Kylo. I am, we all are, "writing" our story everyday. It may not be with pen and paper, or a computer screen, but we are telling our story by living our life. What we are writing is determining our legacy (2). Realistically, I have the power to create my own story. Others are watching my life and they are retelling my stories. What are they saying about me? How is my story being lived out and then communicated to the world around me? "I refuse to be a dead man walkin', thinkin' that's my only option! But I know I can't go back to world that I was livin' in cause I'm dreaming with my eyes wide open (needless to say that the post-covid world is now a different world for EVERYONE)." Because of what the Lord has brought me through the past 10 years, I am "now more than I ever thought that I could be. I won't believe the lie that I need to hide my face; afraid to step outside. I'll be the light that's turnin', bottled up and kept on burnin', proving there is more to me. I will not be afraid to come alive" and forge my own legacy. Essentially, MY story is determining MY legacy. "Forget the cage because I know how to make the key, and suddenly I am going to able to fly to the other side. I am tired of picking up peanut shells and am ready to live among the swells". None of us are ever too old to chose to do the hard work of creating or changing our legacy, regardless of the hand life has dealt us. And that's exactly what I am doing now, and will continue to do after my parole this summer.
Axiomatically, we ALL have the power to create our own story. Others are watching your life and they are retelling your stories. What are they saying about you? How is your story being lived out and then communicated to the world around you? "Take the Word and the world, redefine it, leave behind you narrow mind, you'll never be the same. Come alive!"
The decisions you and I make today define our legacy. It's hard to think about our future that way but our decisions + the stories told about us = our legacy. Our legacy is what it is that is passed down for generations to come. It is a little intimidating to think that the power to change our legacy is based upon our ability to change what we do. Changing what we do changes the plot of our story, and then our new legacy is born. It really is that simple. I did not say it was easy, only that it is simple. Each day we must find the courage to live up to our legacy. It takes courage to stand against the things, the people, the lies and the liars that will try to destroy our legacy every single day.
Each and every day there will be new challenges to face, I promise you. Some will be easy to overcome, others will take an extra dose of self-control and bravery. If you don't like the legacy you are leaving, stop reinforcing it with your behavior and change what you are doing. The everyday choices you make in your character, conduct, and conversation are adding to the foundation of your legacy.
Years ago when my former life partner and I had children we were already thinking decades ahead to a time when we had grandchildren and great grandchildren. We determined what we wanted to create as our Family Legacy. The number one thing on our list was not money, fame, or things it was a good reputation. We wanted a good name for our family. It made us think about the things that would stop us from having a good name. We made a list of things we would not do and a list of things we would do instead. From that point on, we made decisions based on what we wanted our family legacy to be. For our family, the most important legacy we wanted to leave behind is that we were followers of Christ. Our hope was, and still is, that our children and grandchildren will remember that we loved the Lord with all of our hearts and did our best to follow Him every day, and to serve others. That is the legacy we fought for every day: one of honor, righteousness, service, and integrity.
Ostensibly this notion of legacy led us to break ties with our families Laodician church and then led us to Garnett and Park Plaza. Creating this legacy sent us on medical missions in Jinotega, Nicaragua, building houses in Piedras Negras, Mexico, working at YouthWorks® and Habitat for Humanity® in Thunder Bay, Canada, serving in orphanages in Honduras, spending two summers in Guangzhou, China, teaching English with LST.org, crisscrossing the country with GROUP Publishing's CMMLIVE®, leading worship at Redskins for Christ, going into the public elementary schools with Kids for Christ U.S.A.® to conduct Bible studies, organizing summer camps and women's retreats, as well as joyfully lending our time and talent to VBS, classroom teaching, Celebrate Recovery®, and behind the scenes support for many, many other local ministry and missionary efforts. We wanted to leave behind a lasting legacy of love and service to Christ to our descendants.
Undeterred, I refuse to allow others to write my legacy(3). Just as the weaponized false allegations of Myrtha Mikel and Bella Mendoza were exposed at trial (read The Narrative 9-1-2021 blog post and The Truth 10-21-2021 blog post), I also will not allow the manipulation, marionetting, and malignment of my prodigal Absalom/Kylo by Jake Cain, Sarah McAmis and Dianna Baumann to be the author of my future either. The state legislature may try to festoon labels upon me and restrict my future, but they will not diminish my true lasting legacy. I have written previously that had I died on 5-5-2010 rather than be falsely accused and arrested (4), my eulogy would have been one filled with laudations of being an outstanding father and of serving as an exemplary and outstanding educator in Christian, secular, and scouting theaters influencing 1000's and 1000's of children not only in the classroom, but as I worked for NSU and GROUP Publishing training teachers to be better educators. Even upon my release this year I will not allow the state to place a stranglehold on my future legacy. I will not cower nor latibulate under the false label of ex felon (5). I will advocate for a Conviction Integrity Unit for Tulsa County. I will advocate for Trained Juror Pools that will not be susceptible to the well practiced rhetoric flimflam of overly rehearsed district attorneys. I will continue to encourage people that faith in Jesus Christ leads to hope, health, and healing from life's hurts, habits, and hangups. I will be grateful for the opportunity to express the true care, compassion, and concern that Jesus Christ has for those who suffer injustice. I will also be grateful for the opportunity to expose the truly prejudicial, political, and predetermined injustices sought by the Tulsa County District Attorney's office, the injustices adjudicated in Tulsa County courtrooms, and the injustices agreed to by well meaning but maliciously maligned, manipulated, and marionetted Tulsa County juries. I will be an awesome grandfather and zaddy. I will dream with my eyes wide open! This will be the focus of the purpose and legacy of the second half of my life.
Realize my dearly loved children, my Phygelus and Mogenes: YOUR story is determining YOUR legacy! "How do we rewrite the stars? It's up to you, it's up to me; no one can say what we get to be. The world can be ours, our hands aren't tied. Fate does not have to keep us miles apart!"
Life has its ups and downs, its mountain top experiences and its valleys, but we all have the power to create our own story. Others are watching your life and OTHERS (Grandma Ann, Jake Cain, Sara McAmis, Diana Baumann) are shaping YOUR life stories. What are THEY saying about you? How is YOUR story being lived out and then communicated to the world around you?
Essentially, for your parents, the most important legacy we wanted to leave behind is that we were followers of Christ. Our hope was that our children and grandchildren would remember that we loved the Lord with all of our hearts and did our best to follow Him every day, through our love and service to others. That is the legacy we fought for every day.
#this is me
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